A framing.

 But not really, as all that is is today.

And today is ok.

But how did one get here.

And live without fear.

Of tomorrow or yesterday.

I think that's the key and one little lass i do need to have it for her. Maybe one day. Maybe not.

For now a bit of a scribble almost this webpage - just a completely nongeographical no-one-in-particular range of observations - many connected with smaller scale rural existence, that i know matter. And one day i must write about them properly. But i don't write anything much in the summer as being out in it matters more.

Passing on to a child even one not your own the true rural skills in such a quiet gentle way is the best of life.

much more important, now....

Even if the greatest failed project known to human here on maybe-earth was a  good one in intent. And it is not glib to make trgicom out of tragedy + time = comedy said Mister Shakespeare. Ii takes a long time living with tragedy  - otherwise known as 'life events' and billions of others have had them too, within to know he was right.

Not that anyone with a care for a little resistance should value Mr William Shakespeare. I think it's time to drop him too. Not 'cancel' just know that Mary Ann Evans never mind the magnificent Rachel Kushner have it all rather better.  It may well have done a lot of lasting harm deep down that Will's starring women always had things done to them...  rather than real life when any sane man knows women are just as capable of being every little bit of what some man can be. And should be too. 

Now the stories - not that anyone's stories are that interesting to any individual other, but i knew years ago we have an Odyssey here. And there never was any Penelope. Not that she was on my radar.  

What a perfect spring this year and 'my' hill...i don't like much the so overused 'h' word...healing.... but this place somehow did become the healing hill. But only as i put in the footwork to climb it a few times every week, no matter what.

2019ish insight words: "you never ever come back off a walk feeling any worse than you started, indeed always a bit better no matter how bad it is when you start "

Silly - just to prove. Anyway someone saw this; prove to her yes i was almost always on duty from dawn.  

But there is one few years stopping place - 'achin tan' as they say, way above all the fray. Paradise always. Somewhere you can always breathe. 

But then 30 months ago - what a story. What on earth happened to her?   No one stops me dead ... with such grace and simplest yokel humour. That's a saudade even if Cheshire genes. 

most poignant picture you could ever imagine. Imagine for now....soon i shall fill in some gaps.

And yesterday i nearly broke my pledge - only to myself. Saudade is maybe not finished, who knows. 

It was not in fact the kairos yet. 

That would have been symbolically giving up.

Nope not yet.

But the bottom line is small scale farms or smallholding you do need to be two.

Who knows, prepare as if the best of life will in fact happen.

And then.... how can a best day ever happen just like that. I hate neon. But put my lifetime aversion aside when the time is, to do just that... outshone by best smile and spirit ever. 

Just a weird moment. But not really - subversion, in a picture. taken July 2020 when everyone else was still going nuts about everything. She knew high viz just reflects the healing sun. And she liked it that I alone seemed to get her little act of subversion (on 'covid' marshal STASI duty) 

There is one thing that cannot really 'be' saudade in that what do all the gurus of public waffle on who to be hardly ever mention? time passing. Maybe it exists maybe not - it is said at the level of quantum physics it does not really.  Yearning is maybe implicit but yearning for what? The only change one may yearn for yet we seem to forget that is that earthly Newtonian time seems to slow down. Which the psychologists sometimes pinpoint to being the illusion when one packs so much into a life. Continual novel or thrilling real experience. Not silly things like bungee jumping into the Grand Canyon. There are genuine experiences. Some which may be in theory the absolute last one would chose. Because we always forget there will always be a silver lining.  And when you see about ten per year out of about ten per year so called crises or tough times... time so slows down that even someone with a great memory can hardly recall what he was up to   a mere 18 months ago so much didn't but in truth did happen.